Reflecting on being Cour-age-ous: Abounding in heart, full of heart
-ous: possessing the quality of…full of…abounding in
Living in the space of the heart
Full of heart
Full of love
Your heart ready to burst
Bursting with joy Or ripped open
Both an outpouring of love, yet so contrary
So painful, erupting with so much love
Just so much damn, fucking love!
If it’s full, it may overflow…
Springing forth through tears, tears of sadness, anger, grief, frustration, fear, happiness, gratitude, humor, bliss, beauty & LOVE
Bursting at the seams
A broken heart may appear irreparable
Just fucking feel it.
Let the love gush out & allow it to flow in
The same flow
Rising & falling of the tides
Be bold, be tenderhearted
Have you had a broken heart? Do you feel it?
You are full of heart! You are letting the love flow! Feel it. Your sacred heart.
Let the love pour out into the rivers and streams until the oceans are full and surge over the land.
That’s the kind of climate change we need.
I love affirmations and synchronicities, especially when they occur in the midst of quotidian activities like taking out the trash! I had been contemplating this intense Texas heat along with the fiery Leo energy that we have been experiencing, bringing attention to our inner fire, our solar plexus...our ability to burn bright. I recalled an incredible healing experience I had in my first ayahuasca ceremony in the darkness of the Peruvian rainforest and was thinking about how to make it relatable and tangible for others.
It was my first experience with plant medicine, and it took awhile to take effect...not much was happening. Then, a warming sensation began in my belly as if a fire were being gently stoked. There was no pain or burning, just a glow. In my mind’s eye, I saw yellow, growing bigger and I felt as if I had an umbilical cord connecting me to a universal womb. A steady stream of beautiful, nourishing, relaxing, warming light poured into me for several minutes. It was breathtaking and unfathomable, however as undeniable as feeling the heat from a campfire when roasting marshmallows. It also had a very practical feeling, like stopping at the gas station to fill up your tank. As this extraordinary bliss came to an end, I saw a “vehicle” disconnect from me and slowly drift off into space. I wanted to reach out and say, “No, don’t go.” It was so powerful, yet I knew it was leaving because it had done its job.
At the time, I remember thinking this “prana refill” was a boost to make up for an intense school year as a speech pathologist working with lots preschoolers and some intense parents. Six years later, I firmly believe that the universe was preparing me for the tumultuous years that were to come, which have stretched and pulled me in so many directions of beauty, heartache, sadness, love, loneliness, faith and growth through creating a new life, dismantling relationships, forming new ones, pursuing spiritual studies, and changing careers while staying aligned with my soul’s path. I have thoroughly drawn upon that reserve of golden prana, that I know was “source energy”. The plant medicine remains within as a teacher and healer.
So, back to synchronicity. I was thinking, how do I make this out of body yet in my body journey relatable? As I was taking out the trash, I remembered the intention that I had put into the plant medicine for the ceremony and began chanting it in my head as I walked out the front door, and exactly at that moment, an owl began chattering away. Share the intention, share the journey. I smiled and laughed to myself.
“You are on the right track,” he appeared to hoot.
“Yes, yes,” affirmed a second owl with a different sort of call.
(By the way, our English translation of owl doesn’t do it justice. It’s a beautiful, enchanting sound.)
I couldn’t believe that there were two owls and that they were so close. I looked up to see if I could spot them. There, silhouetted with the branches and leaves against the dusky blue sky, the two wise beings were perched peacefully on a limb of the grandmother tree in my backyard. Right there above my house. We looked at each other, and I offered them gratitude. They flew silently away together. Magical, fleeting moments that sometimes cannot be captured anywhere except in the heart.
All of the beautiful, spiritual, and esoteric experiences one may have are tools to make the most of our opportunity to learn, heal and grow on this precious Earth. This is what the owls wanted me to share. This was my intention with the medicine. May you open to grace and allow the light to pour in!
Angel's Prayer by Ty Burhoe
Om Namah Shivaya Gurave
English translation taken from anusarayoga.com (There are various translations.)
I open my heart to the power of Grace
That lives in us as goodness
That never is absent and radiates peace
And lights the way to transformation
My four-year old is hopping excitedly down the trail of streamers that the Easter Bunny left. He races ahead to see if the carrots were eaten, then back to my room to read the notes the Easter Bunny left on the presents, then tears open a present and then back to the trail. Oh my God, he is magical! His life force is boundless...seriously, he gives the Energizer Bunny a run for his money. I want to capture it, this effervescent joy and excitement, his unique comments bubbling forth. But, with a sense of deflation I realize, as I am in the process of filming his sweet words, that my phone storage is suddenly full. I try to delete some things quickly, and it’s still too full. Ugghh. I’m not going to have any adorable, pics to post on facebook or look at in twenty years!!! (Ego doesn’t like this.) I miss documenting it, but I don’t miss it.
It's a perfect reminder to stay in the moment, but there's something more. I just have to listen. As I clean up the confetti from the cascarones, I’m overwhelmed by the way the universe, speaks to me. Synchronicity. My 68G iPhone I’ve had for almost two years is suddenly full, today, a day when there is pure magic to capture which coincides with the day people across the world celebrate the MOST miraculous event in Christianity. What is the universe communicating?
Miracles lie within unseen magic and transformation...all the time!
See them! Pay attention to the magic that is not “visible”. Sometimes it cannot be captured. Have faith in your awareness. Be your own witness to the constant miracles that occur on the internal scape and in the world around you. Often they are imperceptible to others, and they are not bound by religion or culture. Envisioning peace, love and miracles for all, every day!